Monday, October 21, 2024

     Mid-afternoon, I sit on the deck eating a late afternoon lunch, a cheese and ham sandwich and a glass of juice. Warm air blows over me. A blue jay is pounding an acorn with his beak.  Several pigeons speed through the air. A single hawk glides high in the sky.  And the airplanes keep arising and disappearing in the distance. Half a dozen in thirty minutes. On the other side of the airport is the Cancer Center windows where I can watch airplanes descending to the runway.

     I am reading THE DEMON OF UNREST, a saga of hubris, heartbreak and heroism at the dawn of the Civil War, by Eric Larson. So much of the book reminds me of our divisive times. It is a compelling book.

     And I finish watching THE MOONFLOWER MURDERS, a satisfying ending.  Now I am in the middle of Barcelona with the British show, THE DIPLOMAT.

     In the evening, an attack of anxiety arises in my body as I prepare for today’s meeting with the oncologist. I write my issues to discuss with him even though I know that there are no real answers. My mind is abuzz with imaginary conversations and arguments and tears. Finally, I play computer solitaire for a couple of hours and am able to sleep. Arranging those cards in the right order always helps me settle down.