Monday, May 1, 2023

         Two doctor’s appointments this week.  I am writing preparatory notes. I struggle with keeping my doctors interested in treating me.  I sense doctors can only hear up to three concerns in one visit. Perhaps I am just making this all up to feel I have some say in my medical life.

         Yesterday afternoon gusts of wind blew the dried mud up into the air. And this morning, rain again. I hear the familiar drip from the leak in the bathroom skylight.

Finished reading A MATTER OF DEATH AND LIFE by the Yaloms.  At first it was slow and then it caught my attention.  A series of essays from an elderly couple, the wife is dying and the husband is caretaking.

I tease my nurse friend that I am now a doctor, a fake doctor. I have learned doctoring from 92 episodes of NEW AMSTERDAM and 8 episodes of EMERGENCY NYC. I know how to be a doctor. I wanted my doctors to understand my patient experience.  Now I want to understand their experience as doctors. I am trying to unlock the mystery of medical care.