Friday, March 27, 2026    

     So the appointment with the Oncologist goes well.  He does the cystoscopy procedure and says my bladder looks health, no tumors found. Now I wait for the wash water pathology report for possible cancer cells. He tells me I am doing well and I don’t have to come back for 6 months for the next testing.  Unless of course I develop some symptoms or cancer cells are found in the pathology report.

     I am relieved and exhausted. But it is not really over. Bladder cancer is notoriously fickle and reoccurring. But still good news. I feel like I am on parole, that I am out of danger on good behavior. Maybe I am reluctant to hear good news. I have been having difficult treatments and surgeries for 5 years and now maybe I don’t need any more. I am left with lots of treatment caused body damage and I am still alive. So good news and I am tired.

     I am reading my friend, Naomi Estolas, just published book, I LAUGH AT MY MOM WHO HAS PARKINSON’S DISEASE. It is helping me not be afraid of friends’ Parkinson’s disease. Short thoughtful funny essays.  She is wonderful.

     Last night I am alone and watch two episodes of THE CLOSER. Today I am preparing to meet a new doctor, a GI doc to help with my swallowing problems. I am unable to complete their online paperwork. I hope they will help me in their office. I will remind them that I am 85 and filling out forms on line is impossible for me.