Saturday, March 7, 2026

     Yes, I am overthinking this event this morning. I wake up at night, what if I get too tired, what if I can’t find a bathroom, what if there is no place to sit. Endless what ifs. Then a sneaky plan arises, no I don’t have to attend. The Tall Man is my driver and companion to Carmel Valley. I haven’t been this far from home since my emergency ambulance ride to Stanford. Hospital 5 years age. I just want to cry. Of course I am nervous.  Stop, stop worrying about today’s memorial gathering for my writing buddy.

     I put together bags of trash and garbage every day and place them by the front door. Family members take these bags outside to the bins.

     We watch another confusing episode of TEHRAN. I am finding it difficult to follow the plot. My roommate reminds me who is the bad villain and who is the good person. Later we watch more of my favorite comfort show, LONG WAY AROUND, the two middle aged guys riding motorcycles around the world.

      At bed time last night, I heard the owl hooting, the sound coming in through my closed window. A bright moon outside. No dogs barking, no sea lions, just the night owl.

 

Friday, March 6, 2026

     I check the New York times online when I get up in the morning. I don’t want to miss anything significant.  Every article is serious, parts of a puzzle of weapons and people. I still don’t really understand why we are bombing in the Middle East. Maybe my mind can’t stretch wide enough to see humans as we really are. My life now centers on my peaceful neighborhood. I forget how interconnected we are to the rest of the world.

      Really, I must do something about my torn dirty sneakers I have been wearing for years, maybe decades. They are comfortable. They are deteriorating. I am afraid new shoes will trip me up. Falling is the chief danger for me at this time.

     My skin rashes have subsided now that I am taking a Claritin pill in the morning for allergies. No more sneezing, no more scratching. One tiny white pill a day, and my life is better.

      The potato patch now has garlic cloves planted. Several times a day I look for the shoots to sprout up. My roommate checks for signs of gopher intrusions. All the plant activities are still hidden in the soil. Thursday evening we watch the latest episode of THE PITT, our favorite show. We have acclimated to blood and body parts.

 

Thursday, March 5, 2026

     57 degrees in my bedroom as I eat my breakfast. But in the kitchen, it is 70 degrees as the sun warms the room. I turn on the heater for a short time and then turn it off.  I could eat my breakfast in the warm kitchen but I don’t.  I sit in my blue recliner with a warm blanket.

     Two of my favorite women friends visit during the day.  Long warm conversations. As usual I talk too much. The visits make me happy.

          Not surprisingly past events keep popping up in my mind. These loose memories pods keep floating in my mind. I remember a women’s clothing store a friend and I created for several years.  It was a huge failure. My focus was on the business, economic side and my friend did the buying and daily management. I am bad with fashion and she was terrible with money. For years after the store closed, I made monthly payments to various vendors.

     We watch another tense episode of TEHRAN.  The Newshour reports are calmer than the TEHRAN series. The devastating war is real and the dramatic show is not. I am now reading two detective stories. Ann Cleeves novel, THE KILLING STONES, set in present day Orkney Island and Amy Stewart novel, MISS KOPP’S MIDNGHT CONFESSIONS is set in World War 1 west coast America.