Wednesday, September 30, 2009

My neighbors are improving their driveway.
they have powered out the cracked cement and now2 are cutting pavers.

The noise has been going on for a month now.

I can't stand it and yet this is where I live and work.

They said it would be over in a week or so.

I like these neighbors and I am not sure that the improvement is worth the neighborhood noise.

Tuesday, September 29, 2009

The buck stands in the middle of the road as I start the engine of my car. He doesn't flinch. Why is he not at least a little bit afraid of me?. Will his huge antlers protect him from human aggressions? Finally, he slowly moves into my neighbors front yard and starts grazing.

It's late morning, shouldn't he be hiding in the park? Maybe he is taking advantage of he despair we are all feeling about war, money, health care.

He is checking out the neighborhood, wondering if we will soon vacate the premises.

Monday, September 28, 2009

It's dark at 7am now. I need to turn on my headlights when I drive to the Cherry Center for zazen.

My old car had the light on automatically day or night so I forget that I have to both turn them on and turn them off.

Old habits are hard to break.

Saturday, September 26, 2009

Have started reading a book named THE TWIN by Gerbrand Bakker. It's written in Dutch and translated into English.

It's a novel and written is such a clean fashion.

I am enjoying reading it.

Friday, September 25, 2009

Looking out the front window at dusk I see the acacia tree blowing around and then I see boys legs hanging down. The pack of neighborhood boys are in a game.

Later a mother stops by looking for one of the boys. I point out the now still acacia tree as a possibility.

She is not happy.

I guess this is not a place the boys are allowed to play .

I am on the boys side, next time I will not spill the beans.

Thursday, September 24, 2009

The writing circle has started up again. Now I feel pressured to finish an essay every week. I have met the first three weeks but there are many more weeks to come.

Just one day at a time.

Wednesday, September 23, 2009

I think my neighbor of 4 decades has moved away without saying good bye. Of course during this time we didn't say hello. The for sale sign is down, a moving truck was around on Monday and now the garbage cans are abandoned at the foot of his driveway.

40 years, he grew old, his parents died and I grew old.

Maybe I can do better with the new neighbors whoever they are. Sometimes I am not very friendly.

I wonder if they know the type of neighborhood they are moving into.

Monday, September 21, 2009

This morning the city forester dropped by my house to let me know that the city would be taking down the dead pine tree in front of my house next week. It's time.

I am thinking of going to the San Carlos cemetery and harvesting some of the beautiful oak tree acorns to plant in front of the house.

No more pine trees for awhile.

Sunday, September 20, 2009

Went to see a movie last night and it wasn't very good but Now I can't remember the name. uuumm. So I can't warn you about the movie. It's amazing how the memory works, words just disappear and are reluctant to come forward when I call for them. I hope it doesn't get worse.

THE INFORMANT, that's the movie.

Saturday, September 19, 2009

Met with a film maker who is working on a two minute video for a contest on you tube.

Apparently there is a contest about peace. So she filmed us doing meditation at the Cherry Center. She was kind.

It was kind of exciting and also a little dumb.

Well, we will see how it comes out.

Friday, September 18, 2009

My house heated up this afternoon, Finally I realized that it was cooler outside. A friend gave me a book he has self published, MEMOIRS OF MARIPOSA AVE. by Bix Whitcomb.

He has been writing it for a long time and I love it. It is so well written.

I wonder if it will be picked by main stream publishers.

The whole publishing business is such a mystery to me.

Thursday, September 17, 2009

I happened to look at the inside top of my microwave and was shocked to see how dirty it was. Yukie. I don't usually see it.

More deer in the neighborhood, on the streets, in the garden, a big pile of poop by my car this morning.

Blue jays still eating away at the dead sun flower plants.

Wednesday, September 16, 2009

This afternoon after a bar-be-que and meeting we walked the maze at the Community Church in Carmel Valley. Bright sun, slowly walking barefoot around the narrow path, avoiding running into each other.

Eventually I could find my breath and just let go of some of my worries.

the hills, the dry flowers, the breeze all became beautiful.

Tuesday, September 15, 2009

I am in the middle of various books of serious reading. No more mystery stories for now. I finished THE HEALING OF AMERICA, a global quest for better, cheaper, and fairer health care, by T. R. Reid.

I now understand the complexity and possibilities of health delivery systems.

I am ready to join the debate.

Monday, September 14, 2009

Spent a quiet day, napping, reading and eating. I avoided tasks I should have done but I do feel rested now. Tomorrow I go back to work.

Sunday, September 13, 2009

My visiting sister and I go for an early dinner at Fifi's. We eat Steak frites and have long intelligent grown up conversations. Yes, I am back in my life with adults and adult conversations.

the little kids have returned to their parents.

Saturday, September 12, 2009

First fall day, over cast, some rain, cool.

Went to the last part of the John Tarrant koan class this afternoon. The rest of the time it just been me and two young kids. They are now in their beds taking to each other before falling asleep.

Friday, September 11, 2009

The kids are laughing hysterically watching you tube videos called Ed's world. A little too juvenile for me but the laughter is infectious. We are sitting in the living room, they are pushing to stay up as late as possible and I am ready to go to sleep right now. I think they will win and I will fall asleep in my chair.

Thursday, September 10, 2009

The blue jays are coming every couple of hours to feast on the dead sunflower seeds in the garden.The little birds don't have a chance.

The two kids are fighting going to sleep so I am up also.

Wednesday, September 9, 2009

I am slowly reading THE HEALING OF AMERICA, A global quest for better, cheaper and fairer health care, by T R Reid. I now know so much more then before, It is embarrassing how little I knew about health care systems. Now I may understand Obama's speech tonight.

Tuesday, September 8, 2009

They packed up their suitcases and left this morning to catch a plane to New York.

All that little boy energy is slowly drifting out of the house as I wash sheets and put away toys.

they will be back again in the winter but now my house seems so empty.

Time to become friends with myself again. yes it is me here in this quiet home.

Monday, September 7, 2009

Today is the labor day neighborhood picnic. My contribution is tables and chairs. Several little boys came to pick them up. Some of the tables were bigger then the boys. they didn't want any help.

They look forward to this party for weeks, making the invitations, checking on who is coming, who has chairs and tables.

I also made an asparagus salad and a green salad. The boys will not touch them, the salads are for the adults. We expect 32 people to come.

Sunday, September 6, 2009

The four children are a tribe with rules I don't understand. They run through the house on some quest. They know what they are after but the adults are oblivious to the game.

The adults sit drinking coffee and talking as the swirl of noise arises and contracts through the house.

Friday, September 4, 2009

So the back dutch door broke, the top half fell apart and landed with a thud on to the floor. The two stain glass panels were intact.

The door is leaning against the wall in several pieces. So now I have this big gaping hole to the outside deck.

I've been placing a plastic bag with duck tape over the hole to keep out raccoons at night.

So now I have to figure out what to do, replace the door or fix it. After the holiday I will work on this.

Thursday, September 3, 2009

My new car is n longer new looking. It has taken on the facade of neighborhood car, dust, pine needles, kids hand prints and blue jay and crow's poop sliding down the side.

I am now waiting for the license plate to finish the neighborhood look.

Wednesday, September 2, 2009

We drove down the fabulous Big Sur coast with our windows rolled up, air conditioning on, Too hot. the ocean flat, smoke in the air and on the ocean's horizon.

We walked at Malera park to the beach. The little boys flaked out and demanded to be carried back.

And then a lunch at Nepenthe's deck sitting under umbrellas.

Back home I took a nap and the kids and parents went to Targets for something they wanted.

Tuesday, September 1, 2009

I'm learning to slow down and move at the speed of an energetic, distractable 5 year old boy or two boys.

We watch the blue jays swoop down on the sun flowers, we move in and out of the house. I answer lots of questions and then just watch.

Went and had my hair cut at Super Cuts. Make me look normal. The hairdresser laughs and does a good job. Today I do look normal.