Monday, August 17, 2026

     Just cold fog all Saturday. Sigh. I go through my regular routine of meals and sitting in my recliner reading. I start doing the PT exercises I learned last summer before my bout with sepsis.  The sign of improvement is not being afraid of curbs.  Being able to just step up or step down on the curb without fear of falling.

     The gigantic sunflower continues to monitor my every movement from the kitchen window. This flower is my friend. My windows are dirty. I am looking for a recommendation for a window washer.

     The house is quiet most of the afternoon.  My roommate is out to her different events. This morning the young poet’s room door is closed. She must have arrived last night after I was asleep. A friend is coming to visit later in the morning. I want to talk to him about this book I am reading THE MEDICAL ETHIC. We both like to talk about our medical conditions.

     I watch the last sad episode of THE BOMBING OF PAN AM 103. And then we tried a new show MAXIMUM PLEASURE GUARANTEED. First episode was lively and distressing.   Didn’t watch any news stories.  Maybe all is well or maybe I just don’t know.

 

Sunday, August 16, 2026

     It doesn’t help to cry. I feel so sad Saturday morning. I suspect it is living with not knowing what is going to happen next in my bladder cancer journey. Nothing is predictable.  I want to experience today and not wallow in fears for the future.

     Instead of an early nap on the couch, I wash the breakfast dishes and counters, pack up the trash bags and put them by front door, open up the front curtains, and go outside with my nail clippers to work on my finger and toes nails. Yep I do feel better.

     I am reading THE MEDICAL ETHIC, A Philosophical Memoir, self published by Dr. Russell Noblett. The difficulty is understanding the links between current ideas in philosophy with medical decisions based on tests, computers and evidence based medicine. Some of his observations help me understand my medical care these past 6 years. I remembering arguing with a hospital list doctor who entered the room to only look at the computer screens. I thought he should actually talk with me.

     So what is my TV report today?  Nothing really new, watching more episodes of familiar shows. I am ok with my choices but there is not much to write about. I am reading a detective book, NORTHWOODS by Amy Pease. TV watching is fun to do with my roommate and reading is a solitary activity. Did watch Friday’s Ari Melber’s news show about the possible severe economic problems with AI development. Something more to worry about.

 

Saturday, August 15, 2026

     Lots of sunshine on Friday. The house warms up. I am ready to face the day.  This morning, we have thick fog. I have a long list of things needing to be completed. If I do one or two, I will be happy. Some tasks have been on my list for a year.  I am hopeful that I will actually clean out the linen closet and eliminate my clothing pile in the bedroom. 

     The large sunflower is still watching me through the kitchen window. The yellow and red tomatoes are ripe ready to be picked and eaten. A friend comes in the morning bringing a piece of cake and conversation. The Meals on Wheels volunteer brings me my daily meal. A long friendly phone conversation with another friend who just returned from a plane trip. I sleep in the afternoon for two hours.  Guess I was really tired. 

     My roommate’s friend invites me to read and comment on a new memoir coming out soon. At first I say yes and now realize that my brain is not trained to read books on screens. Maybe it is not too late to learn but I am not willing to try. There are so many new shortcuts on line that are beyond my interest to learn. 

     I am still watching the netflix series, THE BOMBING OF PAN AM 103. It is quite moving and now I am grateful for each uneventful plane trip by my family and friends. And am reading NORTHWOODS by Amy Pease, a detective murder story, much less scary than airplane bombs. Dogs barking this morning, lots of airplane noise in the sky. This weekend is the climax of car week. Time to learn how many speeding tickets were given by the local police. No new worrying political news to think about just now.